So yea, I want to be a teacher. Actually, I’ve ALWAYS wanted to be a teacher, but convinced myself they don’t make any money. (This is actually not the case, as I’m finding out while working in a school district.) Teachers kind of have it made! And I keep thinking summers off! Time to spend with my kids! Time to travel! It’s perfect!!
I started looking into it, and it seemed even more perfect! I found out the school district I work for will pay for me to go back to school. I found out I can do it completely online in about five semesters. Everything was falling into place.
Then I remembered that one little tiny piece of information. Student Teaching. One full semester, required to obtain the certificate. (Also included is a half semester of Field Study that I had no idea about). So I talked to my boss to see what my options are. He seemed really supportive and talked to the Superintendent for me. When he came back to me, however, his perspective had changed. Basically I have no options. I can have that semester off to student teach, if and only if I choose to quit my job. That’s all they can do for me. Of course, after hearing this, I was crushed. I love my job, and I’m not sure I can even get a job teaching around here if I did get certified.
Now I’m at a crossroad, and I’m trying to decide what to do.
Justin suggested that I take the classes and make the decision when the time comes. Since student teaching would be two years from now, I could wait it out and see where I’m at then. Sounds good in theory, right? And I even found out that the school will still pay for the leading semesters, as long as I wait one year before quitting. Then I could take that last semester, complete my student teaching, and move on from there. This way, I could continue in the job I love, until just the right moment and then move into a job I hope to love even more! Plus all those other benefits I mentioned earlier!
After considering that, though, I REALLY started thinking…
I moved to Erie for a job. Everyone knows I wasn’t really ready to leave Pittsburgh yet, but they offered me a deal I couldn’t refuse. Since I moved in January, Justin has been trying to get a job up here, but the economy in Erie is even worse than everywhere else in America, so no dice.
And finally, I asked myself: “Lindsey, if you’re willing to quit this job that you love so much, to pursue a different career when really you’re career is NOT the biggest part of your end goal, then why are you not willing to quit this job to pursue the LIFE that you’re desiring that truly IS the biggest part of your authentic happiness? Isn’t what you want to be with Justin? To get married? To have babies??” Living two hours apart has made it difficult for Justin and I to consider our future together. It would be hard to plan a wedding when we only see each other on weekends. And we certainly don’t want to be married and living separately!
Suddenly my head is rushing with options. I can do my schooling online, so I don’t need to be in Erie to get my teaching degree. The jobs I had in Pittsburgh offered tuition help, so I could probably find another one that does also. Justin’s current job would offer schooling to his wife and kids, so even if it meant waiting a while longer, that would maybe be an option too, if he continues to work there. So many thoughts. So many questions.
I’m kind of in a good spot, though. I mean, I have a really good job, and can make this all happen as things stand now. But I also have this other potentially great option lingering in the balance. So what’s to come?
For a short while I’m going to sit pretty and wait for some things.
First, I spoke with Justin, and voiced my concern that I’ll be giving up pretty much EVERYTHING to go back to Pittsburgh on a whim, just to be with him. I think it’s reasonable to desire some form of set-in-stone commitment from him before I choose to do that. I mean, I will not be moving back in with his mom, that’s for sure!
Second, I’m going to talk to a few more schools, some in Pittsburgh, about my options for online classes and what it will actually take to get this done!
Third, I’m going to take in every last thing my boss wants to teach me about networking and my current job. In the event that I will need to find a new job in Pittsburgh, I want to broaden the range of what I can apply for now!
Lastly, I’m going to savor every moment I have in Erie, as if it were my last. If I move back to Pittsburgh, that’s going to be it. I’m probably not coming back again.
So that’s where I’m at. Filled with mixed emotions, but still in a good spot. Really, whatever I choose will work out because it’s supposed to. That’s what I keep telling myself.
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
When i got my internship in NYC my fiancée and i were apart for 3 solid months before i came back. And it was an 8 hour drive back to Erie from NYC so it wasn’t even close to feasible to do it on a weekend. Then when i got my job in NYC we were separated again for longer while she sold her house in Erie and finished planning our wedding. We had set the wedding date long before i got my job. Seriously i flew back to Erie, we got married, went on our honeymoon then were like “ok see you in a month” and i got on a plane and flew back to NYC. A month later she finally moved to here and we could actually start being married.
Sometimes things are hard and due to circumstances and opportunities outside of your control but if you know its a worthwhile endeavor its worth all the distance and sacrifice and in the end it will pay off.
I LOVe that you’re thinking through these things! I know it’s frustrating and overwhelming now, but just look at the energy you’re putting into deciding what your best options are :) I think that’s always rewarded. I’m in the middle of the Joy Equation (I took a few weeks of a hiatus because I couldn’t quite finish the Audio Session, then I rearranged my priorities and LOVED it), and I’m finding so much clarity in the things I love and want. I knew a lot of them, but it’s awesome how dedicating time to yourself helps identify those VALUES :) I can’t wait to see where this takes you!
Such clarity, even in the confusion of a million options. LOVE that you’re taking time to think about it instead of just rushing in. Sit pretty and soak it all up. Keep exploring. You are SOOOO on the right track for YOU!
You sound so solid and happy, despite the unstable nature of things currently in your life. You’ve got it, and you’re gonna own it. xo
Lindsey! This is all so great for you! I received my Stratejoy pack about a month ago but I haven’t gotten started at all. Your posts have inspired me to finally crack down. Eventually, thins will all start to fall into place for you. Sometimes it helps to just sit back and have an open heart to the things around you. It’s always so tempting to analyze everything over and over, but I’ve found that if you just sit back and enjoy it, it’ll figure itself out. Good luck to you on your journey! :)
sounds to me like you’re ont the right track; thinking through it all, analyzing the options, pros/cons and being an adult about it! I think sometimes we let the smallest (and biggest) obstacles stand in our way of what we really want to do! So excited for you and the journey you have ahead of you! xoxox
I love the way that you’re approaching this – especially the part about talking to Justin & giving him a change to respond before you pull up stakes. It sounds like you’re going to be setting off on an amazing journey no matter what you choose & I’m excited to follow along <3
You’ve certainly got a great mind-set, and that is always so important. Keep exploring your options – it sounds like there are many, and I’m sure a fabulous opportunity will present itself.
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